Do Saudi men only know what their future wives look like after they get married?

Do Saudi men only know what their future wives look like after they get married?
Some years ago, I read a book which told the the real life of a Saudi princess, and gave a picture of Saudi society (in the seventies).

I thought this Saudi princess was a remarkable woman, and this was probably the best book I’ve read so far.

She said her marriage was arranged, and she was only supposed to meet her husband on their wedding day.
But given to her strong character, she insisted so much, that her father agreed they met before the wedding.
After this, they also spoke on the phone a couple of times, which was also unusual by then.

I was convinced that this should be the norm in Saudi Arabia.

But recently I heard someone on this board say that in Saudi Arabia, a bride seeking male has to ask the permission of a girl’s father to meet her.
After that, he’s free to choose whether he wants to get engaged to her or not, and if he does, he can still see her some times before the wedding.
A male relative has always to be present, though.

Is it like this now?
Sorry, but there was no space above for more. (Just 2 characters were left available).

Suggestion by Nora
no, all of the girls that i know have seen their future husbends before marriage.
it’s lagel in Islam to see ur future wife before marrying her
what u recently heard is so true..
she is also free to choose whether she wants to get engaged to him or not

Suggestion by loolita
of course we can talk, see each other(( with mahram)) and then we can decide,,
this is not saudi habits,, it is islamic law.
this is a decision for our life . so, we shouldn’t be in the dark.

Suggestion by Mintee
Its perfectly legal and allowed within Islam. (and I think a must) that you see your future spouse prior to marriage.. You need to know who your life partner is going to be… Our Prophet Mohammed even worked for his wife before he married her. He obviously saw her daily for years before they got married.. They were good friends and good business partners beforehand..
Usually the custom here, is someone in the family knows of a person that is enterested in getting married.. They usually know another person who might be the other party interested.. I might have a girlfriend 24yrs old, who wants to get married.. I might know a good friend of my older brother, some dude, same age, employed, good family that has been interested in finding a wife.. I contact her mother, tell her about Joe Doe.. Mother seems interested, tells daughter. Daughter takes the interest.. Mother of daughter calls me back. I then call Joe’s mother (or my mother/Aunt, Granma) calls Joes mother, and they talk to Joe.. Joe might take the bait.. he says yes.. so they, both families arrange a meeting at someones house.. Joe comes by, he meets Jane (without head covering by the way), sits and talks to her in the parlor.. Family members are close by.. (a must) if they seem agreeable, they then choose to formally announce an engagement.. They get this done legally in front of a religous sheik… Then this is the period of real get to knowing each other.. THe two intended parties can go out in public together if they wish… Then after some getting to know each other, a formal wedding party is done… BUT if for some reason the two just dont get along or not compatable, they can break the engagement off with no ill effects whatso ever… (the lady is still a virgin,, a must here) and no bad thoughts are held against her or him… .. Thats usually how its done here..

Answer needed for painting textured ceiling and wall?
I have the exact same texture and my ceilings and walls. I painted a bedroom and used painters tape to mask off the ceiling (ceiling was white and was using dark blue for walls). After painting, I removed painters tape and the blue ran onto the ceiling. I assume this happened because the ceiling was textured and the painters tape did not fully adhere to the ceiling and left gaps where the paint got into. My question is how do I prevent this in the future? I’ve read about ‘cutting in’ but tried doing this to fix the blue color on the ceiling and just wound up getting more blue on the white ceiling. I need to paint the rest of my house, the ceilings will be white with beige walls, there has to be something out there besides painters tape and free handing it that will prevent either color from bleeding onto the other. We have a knockdown texture and using the painters tape, paint edger, and freehanding it will not create a crisp straight line, PLEASE HELP!

Suggestion by norman7774
The first thing I would ask is … the painter’s tape.. is it the brown color or the blue color? I use and recommend ONLY the blue color

Suggestion by igollert
Free hand is your best bet with a really good brush…just take your time and it will come out fine. Even better, get a friend who is a good painter just to do the trim near the ceilings!

Suggestion by captsnuf
i rarely use tape, when i do tape to a painted surface i use a lite tack or safety release tape (so it won’t pull the paint when i remove the tape) then i “knife” the tape down, using my putty knife i press the tape with medium pressure with the flat part of the blade and drag down the length of the tape, this presses the tape firmly to the surface. i don’t pile paint on the tape and expect it to protect anything, i use it for a straight edge and cut to it, trying to keep paint off the tape, it i get any on the tape it is on the tape and not on the protected surface, because i use a dryer brush to cut really close to the tape. around ceilings you only have to be close, and most new houses have a corner groove cut into the surface separating the wall from the ceiling, take a little time, and slow down and study how the paint beads on the end of your brush and how you can controle it and draw a straight line…
or you may decide that painting is not for you (and there is no shame in that) and you can hire a painter. a professional painter can get your painting done quickly and neatly, and save you alot of frustration and headache. however get references, don’t hire the first person that calls themself a painter, get references and check them out.

Pain of Losing My Wonderful Dog…..?
I’m a 40 year old married guy. I’m not some new-age touchy feel-y type who thinks it’s cool or liberating to weep, cry, or show my emotions. In fact crying gives me a headache, so I prefer to avoid it altogether. I do cry, just like anyone else, but I prefer to do it in private.

I lost my wonderful, sweet, loyal dog somewhat suddenly 3 weeks ago (congestive heart failure) and obviously shed many tears the few days after it happened. The tears have mostly dried but I’m still wounded having lost a true gem of a dog and (I can’t stress this enough) my best friend and best companion I’ve ever had – Whoops! There’s those darn tears again

Dogs are so great. My dog lived 12 years and 4 months. It’s just very hard knowing we couldn’t have had him for another couple years. He added a spunk and clownish fun to my house that I’m not sure will easily be replaced.

People who know me assume “it’s only a dog etc” and think it’s a pretty easy thing for me to deal with. If only they knew how important this “dog” was and is to me.

I have lost loved ones and have grieved for those losses but there’s something about losing my constant companion that makes losing a dog more difficult to deal with. I don’t want to put a dog’s life over a human’s but I can’t deny how much it stings to lose my little buddy.

Hopefully I’ll be ready for another dog in the not-too-distant future.

Thanks for reading. Feel free to share you’re own stories.

Suggestion by Kol Kol
I have lost 7 pets. They all gave me friends when I was shy, they all played with me when I was alone, and sometimes they saved my life when I was in danger. They were the best things ever, they were the sweetest. They were all buried in the graveyard. Its okay to grieve, but you should try and get a shelter mutt, they help more than you think.

Suggestion by Danielle
I lost my best dog friend too, this year. I had gotten him from the shelter for free just before he was put to sleep. When I brought him home and set him down, he started sprinting around the house like a jet! So that’s what I named him. (: Jet stuck by my side always and he followed my dad to work. He became known as the “shop dog” around here because people would come in and be greeted my him. But this year, the worse thing happened I would ever dream of. I had gotten a call from my dad’s work saying Jet had been struck and killed by a speeding semi. I balled my eyes out that whole month. D: People who saw Jet get hit by the car stopped and carried him off the road. They recognized who he was and was sad too. I buried him in a box decorated with all his favorite things…

Suggestion by cj
I understand your pain,…to others he may have been “just a dog” but to you he was SO much more. Mourning is such an individual path that we travel,, there is no right or wrong way or a certain amount of time that we should “get over It..

I lost my 6 year old dog last Oct to cancer and I am still grieving over his loss. He gave so much and asked for so little in return and I think that is one of the things that make dogs so very special.

Not everyone will ever have the pleasure of having a deep bond with a dog…I think they are the unlucky ones. Those of us who have loved and been loved by a special dog (I call them heartdogs) are very lucky indeed. The pain is great when we lose them…..

Just remember you will never replace your wonderful dog and it would be unfair to expect another dog to be like him but maybe in time you will be able to love another dog in a different way.

I lost my dog last Oct., When I hear other dogs named the same as mine I have to tell you that it brings up painful emotions ….others tell me it will get better???? Not yet not for me.

My deepest condolences to you on the loss of your “Heartdog”

EEOC case, wk comp, support groups, future advice.?
EEOC case, work comp system, dis. eligibility, support groups. How to live?
Bless all those who’ve been thru these systems-work comp and reporting discrimination. Both a sham of a process.
I’ll try to be brief.

Info as to what happens next in the process? Any support groups you know of-online is good. Info on what my future options are, are greatly appreciated.

I was injured at work 14 yrs ago due to faulty equipment-kept working full-time. Continually attended PT, usually on my own time. Had to use wk comp PT and Drs only. I became a supervisor and had excellent eval’s. Am a single parent.

New boss’ took over our co. and began to rid it of all but the loafers; they had a personal agenda. 3 since been fired.

I was continually transferred to physically demanding work areas despite my requests and Dr’s orders to stay in my current capacity; I was reinjured twice. This led to retaliation by the boss toward me. I just wanted to stay at work and stay off of their ‘target’ list.
I filed a complaint; it was ignored.
Filed an EEOC complaint. Investigator brushed

* 13 minutes ago
* – 3 days left to answer.

Additional Details

6 minutes ago
me off; ended up yelling at me. She was far passed the legal time limit; from her comments she’d never read the case.
I almost gave up; had a nervous breakdown. I could not work; was in chronic pain, getting less than 1/3 my income, can’t care for myself or my child. Still being retaliated against.

I filed a complaint with EEOC. Now had a ‘real’ investigator listening. Took 4yrs to get him and info together.
EEOC found strongly in my favor; sent a strong letter to my employer for conciliation. Laws were broken.
My employer said since I got work comp benefits, they were done with it. Never knew I needed accommodations. (It is in my file there)
EEOC could file suit on my behalf, but only for back pay. I work for the ‘state’ who passed a law that no one can sue them!
EEOC instead referred the case to the Dept of Justice.
DOJ says they do not have enough workers to file suit in every case; only VERY few.

Could the police say, well you broke the law but we don’t have DA’s or jail

0 seconds ago
space, so you go free?

THANIKS TO ANYONE STILL HANGING IN THERE AND READING!

Now I can ‘sue’ on my own. I have to prove that they worsened my condition. I meet with an atty for first time Monday.
I’m cynical for good reason; PT helps little, is a 2hr drive ea. way to a specialist twice a week who once again, looks down on wk cp patients.

What happens next with filing suit against a state entity?
My mental issues are as bad or worse than my physical ones. I am overwhelmed merely with everyday life. I have intermittant clarity and strength.
Since I worked for the state and we do not pay SS tax ( I did for 15yrs prior) I don’t think I qualify for SS Dis., or any assistance. I’m 45.

My future looks bleak to me. The ‘system’ aids those very young, and those very old (not enough) but if you’re in the middle, you’re screwed it seems.

I hate being on wk cp-5 yrs now; humiliating.
Dr said if my condition had been treated properly to begin with it would be better-perm. damage is done.
Help

Suggestion by americanfreeman
go to work. geeeez

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